Based on the preview from last week, a viewer would have not a clue that this episode was actually going to be relating to our main apocalypse storyline. I'm glad it did, though, because how lame would a stand alone episode have been at this point in the game? But also sort of lame so late in the game? The boys suddenly finding out a super special secret plan that only Gabriel seemed to know. Really. No one else knew about this? I find that hard to believe. But I'm jumping ahead.
The episode started out seeming like a stand alone, even featuring a patented location card of Muncie, Indiana (not that we care). Some police-ish dude walking around a demolished hotel that is slowly putting itself back together, then meeting a creepily upbeat hotel manager who promptly kills him. And with all of the good transitions into the splat title card they've been doing lately, I was a little disappointed with this one. Come on, you could've splatted right with the blood! Psh.
In any event, the boys show up at the Elysian Fields Hotel (oh my, could that be a clue?!) after getting detoured there during a freak rain storm. Everything appears to be bright and perky at this hotel at first, with mountains of pie to please the newly-re-energized Dean, as well as some Casa Erotica. Don't even front, Sam, we know you watch that stuff. However, this motel turns out to be not so great after all! O.M.G. What a surprise. I think I might have a heart attack and die from not surprise! (Name that movie reference!)
Luckily, though, the brothers Winchester cotton on almost immediately to the strangeness of this hotel, and start investigating, leading them to a meat locker full of innocent people. But before they can free those poor schmucks, they're detained by what turn out to be a bunch of Pagan gods. The ones who get the special name treatment are: Kali, Odin, Ganesh, Baron Samedi, and Baldur. Oh, and that hotel manager is Mercury. If you're not entirely sure who these gods are, don't worry, you'll never really find out.
These gods are having a confab about the whole Western religion apocalypse doom and gloom pestering the world of late, and they lured Sam and Dean here for bargaining chips to somehow get Lucifer and Michael out of the way or some such. As they are discussing their plans, though, guess who pops in to say hello! Why, it's Gabriel, formerly known as the Trickster, and to these gods as Loki. Because they're too stupid to realize who he really is. Actually, for being gods, they didn't seem to have any sort of powers except for Kali. A hand through the chest is all it takes to kill these dudes? Well, jeez.
Gabriel has a chat with the Winchesters, wherein Dean basically calls him a wuss and tells him to stand up to his brother, yada yada. The gods try to kill Gabriel because it turns out Kali actually knows who he really is. Oh, and they had some sort of romantic thing in the past. It doesn't really matter all that much. Eventually Dean tells the gods that he and Sam will play ball and work together to kill Lucifer. They just have to call him up.
Turns out, they don't need to, because Mercury already has, to his everlasting regret, I'm sure, because Lucifer rewards him by killing him. And then goes all badass rather than just being a whiny babypants, and kills the rest of the gods. He's about to do in Kali, but then Gabriel shows up just in time and gets Sam and Dean to whisk her away. He and Lucifer then whine a bit to each other about their plight. Gabriel has sided with the humans. Lucifer says sucks to be you and kills him! Yep, another one bites the dust. So long, Richard Speight, Jr., you were usually a fun guest star.
But Gabriel has one last surprise for the Winchesters. He told them to take that Casa Erotic DVD with them, so they fire that baby up. And here's where that aforementioned lame duck excuse of a last minute plan is revealed. Gabe reveals that the boys aren't going to be able to kill Lucifer, but there is a way for them to put him back in his cage in Hell. All they have to do is find the key to the cage. Or rather, keys. And what are these keys? Why, they are the rings of the Four Horsemen. And they already have two of them, from War and Famine. So now they just have to get the last two - Pestilence and Death. While evading Lucifer and the other angels, natch. Is anyone else sort of disappointed in this plan?
And then we get a really gross scene showing Pestilence. And. Blugh. Barf. Nasty. Flies are buzzing as he enters a convenience store. He then proceeds to cough nasty splooge all over everything, including the store worker's face. It looks like the nastiness of this dude will rival that of our ole Famine. YIGH.
Was anyone else a little taken out of the moment when the Ghostfacers thing came on? I didn't know if it was supposed to look like an interruption, or like a commercial. It turns out it was maybe a combination leaning toward the latter, but it confused me because the tone was so different from this episode. Anyway, I've watched the first four of the webisodes so far, and they're good for a laugh.
The preview for next week actually was decent this time around! I have an idea what the episode might actually be about?! What! Why, that's not the point of a preview at all!
Quotes (not many this week... there were a LOT of speeches):
"Heaven, right?" - random dude
"Trust me, pal. Better." - Dean
"Sam. Unpucker man, eat something." - Dean
"What are you, twelve?" - Sam
"I'm young at heart." - Deam
"Creepy." - Sam
"Broke the needle." - Dean
"Don't mock my world turtle!" - ? Iroquois dude? I never saw his name tag.
"Those guys are either gonna dust you, or use you as bait. Either way, you're uber-boned." - Gabriel
"I'll take your voices away." - Gabriel
"We'll write it down." - Dean
"I'll cut off your hands." - Gabriel
"Well then people are gonna be asking, why are you guys running around with no hands?" - Dean
"Now we can take out the devil together, or you lame asses can eat me. Literally." - Dean
"You'd think I'd give Kali my real sword? That thing can kill me." - Gabriel
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